I was wondering this recently when it occurred to me quite how many beautiful National songs there are about break ups, sometimes specifically divorce. I’ve attached some examples below. I was really intrigued by his explanation here about the therapeutic role which writing these songs has served for him:
Finding somebody to connect with and keeping that connection is really challenging. Most relationships aren’t going to work out. But even from the short ones, the bad ones, you learn so much. There’s not a single relationship that I’ve had that I don’t reflect fondly on. When I met Carin [Besser, Berninger’s wife] I knew this is the one, and we’ve been together 20 years. You have to allow the other person to grow. Learning to recalibrate is not easy, but that’s how stuff lasts. I’m always trying to paint the shadows to figure out what are the things that make relationships fall apart and how to avoid that. I write a lot about things I want to avoid – Eucalyptus is about what would happen if we really did split up, whether the band or marriage. I have a really healthy marriage but I think that’s because I write about looking into the abyss.
https://www.theguardian.com/music/2023/apr/21/the-nationals-matt-berninger-i-have-a-healthy-marriage-because-i-write-about-looking-into-the-abyss
The fact I think the later albums have been co-written with his wife Carin Besser further intrigues me. GDH and M Cole wrote detective fiction together. Berninger and Besser write, amongst other things, songs about divorce. I’d love to hear a more detailed discussion from them about their writing process, particularly when it touches on relationships. I’m struggling to find an interview I saw recently where Daughter’s Igor Haefeli (the guitarist) talks about not intruding on the lyrical process of his partner Elena Tonra (singer and writer). Though her later solo album documents a subsequent breakup, which she released solo in part because she didn’t want to work on it creatively with Haefeli.
Mark Carrigan 